The major achievement in life is discovering yourself
I started writing few years ago, not because I wanted to pursue it, but to let out the pain and ease myself amidst my haunting thoughts. “Do not show what you really are“ “Fake it!“, were the sentences people pasted on my face, ’cause apparently hiding the truth was the ‘new cool’ HIDE- ’cause you need friends, “Who is going to befriend me if I cry out my desires and thoughts?“ “I don’t want to be a crybaby, or a narcissist“ I tagged my qualities with the worst words I could find, so as to only HIDE. The actions were to fit in, to squeeze in the line where thousands stood waiting, to get what others wanted. “Did I want it?” ‘It’ was the missing piece, the one I thought was the one which others had, but why was I not happy when ‘It’ landed my hands? I was getting lost in the maze of my thoughts, when a door emerged between the walls, so I ran towards it, opened and stepped out, not thinking for a second, if this is what ‘It’ is. If I had, I would not have surrounded myself with the plethora of magic in hand.
I toooook a long break, Yes the ‘took’ has 5 o’s, and yes I took a long break. I know I know, I’ve been saying this for a while, but it is hard for me to decide. With god’s grace I have got a job, friends I can rely on. and finally found love of my life, or have I? But still, something is missing. But what is it?
I lay down thinking, thinking about that friend who pushed me over the cliff, not because he hated me, but for me to feel the wind over my face, to smash my body over the ocean of my thoughts,
I know I’ve been on and off in this relationship with you, but you know you are my home, ’cause even after I wander and roam to places, I come back to you. You are my escape, but when you get to close, you are a jail. It’s hard for me to survive my own thoughts, sometimes I ignore, but how long can I run from myself
So I let them soak in, deep. Only the positive ones though, ’cause you are a spectator, viewing the trails of thoughts passing by, only to turn the light green for the thoughts to get to you, not to be submerged in the darkness of our own flipped side.
I know things are not going your way, and that it nags the hell out of you. But, Not always can you get what you really want. If you think that life is a bed of roses, then you have been in a delusion my friend. Yes, a big delusion. There is no fairy godmother, or a prince charming for whom you shall wait in a secluded tower of your thoughts.
My heart was swinging to and fro with the waves of affection.
There was a rise and fall of my little yacht in the stormy ocean.
There was no escape and even if there was,
I didn’t want to exit the newly discovered world.
I could feel the sense of belonging as he leaned in and imprinted on my shoulder.
This one time in my life I knew it wasn’t just a spark but an explosion of emotions.
His hands embraced my neck and he moved forward to land small peck.
His hands moved towards my breasts as I moaned with a low voice in excitement.
He came slowly towards my lips and dissolved himself within me.
As my lips a part, I could realise the sudden jitters and rush in my body.
I was on fire, I realised.
His tongue slid inside my mouth and we reached the end together.
I knew there was more to this.
There was another stage even after the climax.